Marriage is more than your love for each other. It has a higher dignity and power, for it is God’s holy ordinance, through which he wills to perpetuate the human race till the end of time. In your love you see only your two selves in the world, but in marriage you are a link in the chain of the generations, which God causes to come and to pass away to his glory, and calls into his kingdom. In your love you see only the heaven of your own happiness, but in marriage you are placed at a post of responsibility towards the world and mankind. Your love is your own private possession, but marriage is more than something personal—it is a status, an office. Just as it is the crown, and not merely the will to rule, that makes the king, so it is marriage, and not merely your love for each other, that joins you together in the sight of God and man. As you first gave the ring to one another and have now received it a second time from the hand of the pastor, so love comes from you, but marriage from above, from God. As high as God is above man, so high are the sanctity, the rights, and the promise of marriage above the sanctity, the rights, and the promise of love. It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Letters and Papers from Prison
Friday, December 3, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Rest
Today I almost (okay, I did) lose it several times (okay, really more like at least 100 times)...
I changed the poopy diapers of THREE kids still wearing those darn things.
I cleaned off the disgusting high chair at least 5 times. (I really want to take it outside and power wash it. Like, multiple times, people. Seriously, of all things baby, I hate the high chair the most. The crusted on food, the cracks full of crumbs, the constant stickiness...)
I listened to and forced myself to deal with multiple temper tantrums.
I walked away for a second, a second! and turned around to find out that Ava has figured out how to climb onto our kitchen counter...she pulls up with an above average grip, uses her feet as traction on the cabinets and then gets a knee up onto the counter...what in the world? I need to get her in rock climbing already!!! (Now, how to baby proof kitchen counters????)
I fed, clothed, played with, read to, hugged, kissed, timed-out (is that a word), fed some more, cuddled more, attempted a clean up of what I affectionately call toy-vomit in my house, played with more, cleaned up more...you get the idea, then called my husband to pick up frozen pizzas on the way home b/c there was no way I was going to cook and we had small group at our house tonight and more guests tomorrow night and Saturday night, I could go on, but I won't....
Aahhh...that's what I feel like right now. There's a lot going on and you know what I forgot to do today? I forgot to rely on God. I tried it myself and I FAILED. epic.mom.fail. If I could have a fail blog, today would be on it. I don't feel guilty, just stupid.
So, tomorrow (and the rest of tonight because I know there will be a wake up from deep sleep moment or two...or three):
Matthew 11:28-29 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."
I changed the poopy diapers of THREE kids still wearing those darn things.
I cleaned off the disgusting high chair at least 5 times. (I really want to take it outside and power wash it. Like, multiple times, people. Seriously, of all things baby, I hate the high chair the most. The crusted on food, the cracks full of crumbs, the constant stickiness...)
I listened to and forced myself to deal with multiple temper tantrums.
I walked away for a second, a second! and turned around to find out that Ava has figured out how to climb onto our kitchen counter...she pulls up with an above average grip, uses her feet as traction on the cabinets and then gets a knee up onto the counter...what in the world? I need to get her in rock climbing already!!! (Now, how to baby proof kitchen counters????)
I fed, clothed, played with, read to, hugged, kissed, timed-out (is that a word), fed some more, cuddled more, attempted a clean up of what I affectionately call toy-vomit in my house, played with more, cleaned up more...you get the idea, then called my husband to pick up frozen pizzas on the way home b/c there was no way I was going to cook and we had small group at our house tonight and more guests tomorrow night and Saturday night, I could go on, but I won't....
Aahhh...that's what I feel like right now. There's a lot going on and you know what I forgot to do today? I forgot to rely on God. I tried it myself and I FAILED. epic.mom.fail. If I could have a fail blog, today would be on it. I don't feel guilty, just stupid.
So, tomorrow (and the rest of tonight because I know there will be a wake up from deep sleep moment or two...or three):
Matthew 11:28-29 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Emotions
November is National Adoption Month...and I could write my own thoughts down, but some really smart, cool people who I want to be when I grow up have already written very eloquently about so many issues. Here is just one link to a post about Honoring First Families. Please read it if you're interested at all in adoption related issues. I think she does a great job with some tough realities.
Honestly, these past four months holding and cuddling Kylah have made me so emotional in ways I wasn't with Ali, because I have the beyond-words-privilege of being Ava's mommy. I missed her first 5 months, but her first mom is missing her life...for a myriad of reasons of which I know only a very, very few. I think and pray for her everyday, and I pray that Ava will know how much I love her as my daughter and how much I honor and respect her birth-mom. I trust in God's plan for all of our lives and I know He is powerful to redeem. What I pray is that Ava will find her identity first and foremost in Jesus Christ, that she will know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is loved in this family, and that if she someday desires, she will also have an opportunity to meet her birth-family, if that's important to her. But if she doesn't meet them on this earth, I pray daily that God is redeeming their hearts and souls and that we will all meet in heaven with a celebration of recognition and joy at what God has done.
Honestly, these past four months holding and cuddling Kylah have made me so emotional in ways I wasn't with Ali, because I have the beyond-words-privilege of being Ava's mommy. I missed her first 5 months, but her first mom is missing her life...for a myriad of reasons of which I know only a very, very few. I think and pray for her everyday, and I pray that Ava will know how much I love her as my daughter and how much I honor and respect her birth-mom. I trust in God's plan for all of our lives and I know He is powerful to redeem. What I pray is that Ava will find her identity first and foremost in Jesus Christ, that she will know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is loved in this family, and that if she someday desires, she will also have an opportunity to meet her birth-family, if that's important to her. But if she doesn't meet them on this earth, I pray daily that God is redeeming their hearts and souls and that we will all meet in heaven with a celebration of recognition and joy at what God has done.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Outsourced
Birthday cake making ranks right there with changing poopy diapers for me...unfortunately I can rarely outsource the poop, but the cake...that can be delegated to Oma (aka Grandma) who actually enjoys the process of making an elaborate creation that is destined for destruction. But don't worry, Oma, this is the place that I can immortalize the amazing Dora cake...
Happy 3rd Birthday, Sweet Aliana!
Happy 3rd Birthday, Sweet Aliana!
Friday, September 10, 2010
Hmmm...
So, I'm thinking about doing this experiment, maybe officially, maybe on my own, but definitely would like to try...six items or less for a month...
Considering the fact I'm not much of a fashionista (that's an understatement; I mean, I wear the same flip-flops all summer, and only have 2 pairs of "winter" shoes. But I do love jeans. And t-shirts.), I figure it'd kinda be cheating for me to do it, but still, it's interesting. I'm guessing I wouldn't find it much different than what I already do. I must admit I often find myself only reaching for the same items of clothing anyway.
A much more radical experiment here: The Great American Apparel Diet. I tried this (I mean, not this specific experiment, but just my own "New Year's Resolution" to not buy clothes for a year) a few years back...I made it about 8 months and then broke down and bought some clothing article. Can't even remember what it was...
I find these experiments interesting for a number of reasons...lately I've been feeling like my house is vomiting STUFF and I'm so tired of it. But then I still want to buy stuff. What is that? I feel that God's reminder that He is all we need and the mandate to use our money for kingdom purposes is often drowned out by the materialism pushed on us by society.
I also find it really annoying that I had to push a toddler screaming through Target...for what, you ask? She wanted a piggy bank and by the time I bought trash bags and toilet paper (the whole purpose of the trip), the whole store knew what Ali wanted. A piggy bank. Didn't even know she knew what one was. So, the knowledge my daughter is also being programmed to want more frightens me. Because I have the same urge. And it's really strong when it comes to my kids. I love buying them stuff. And then I hate that my house is cluttered with that same stuff. An interesting conundrum.
Then Pete and I watch this on PBS last night: Beyond Babyland. Mega-convicting and a good reminder that there is a huge gap in our own country. I mean seriously, I have WAY.MORE than I could ever need while people are living in poverty right around the corner from me. And then I read this on the blog on earth as it is in heaven The disparity is huge. And I have to figure out a way to live with it. My way is to live with less. And I need huge reminders of that many, many times. I let greediness creep back into my life and forget the blessed and eternal ways to spend money.
And then there's this: Matthew 6:24 No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money (or the stuff money can buy).
Considering the fact I'm not much of a fashionista (that's an understatement; I mean, I wear the same flip-flops all summer, and only have 2 pairs of "winter" shoes. But I do love jeans. And t-shirts.), I figure it'd kinda be cheating for me to do it, but still, it's interesting. I'm guessing I wouldn't find it much different than what I already do. I must admit I often find myself only reaching for the same items of clothing anyway.
A much more radical experiment here: The Great American Apparel Diet. I tried this (I mean, not this specific experiment, but just my own "New Year's Resolution" to not buy clothes for a year) a few years back...I made it about 8 months and then broke down and bought some clothing article. Can't even remember what it was...
I find these experiments interesting for a number of reasons...lately I've been feeling like my house is vomiting STUFF and I'm so tired of it. But then I still want to buy stuff. What is that? I feel that God's reminder that He is all we need and the mandate to use our money for kingdom purposes is often drowned out by the materialism pushed on us by society.
I also find it really annoying that I had to push a toddler screaming through Target...for what, you ask? She wanted a piggy bank and by the time I bought trash bags and toilet paper (the whole purpose of the trip), the whole store knew what Ali wanted. A piggy bank. Didn't even know she knew what one was. So, the knowledge my daughter is also being programmed to want more frightens me. Because I have the same urge. And it's really strong when it comes to my kids. I love buying them stuff. And then I hate that my house is cluttered with that same stuff. An interesting conundrum.
Then Pete and I watch this on PBS last night: Beyond Babyland. Mega-convicting and a good reminder that there is a huge gap in our own country. I mean seriously, I have WAY.MORE than I could ever need while people are living in poverty right around the corner from me. And then I read this on the blog on earth as it is in heaven The disparity is huge. And I have to figure out a way to live with it. My way is to live with less. And I need huge reminders of that many, many times. I let greediness creep back into my life and forget the blessed and eternal ways to spend money.
And then there's this: Matthew 6:24 No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money (or the stuff money can buy).
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Confessions
I am sometimes self-conscious about the way I look. There, I said it. But I think most girls probably are, right? And having just had a baby, my self-consciousness is at an abnormal high. And being in a bathing suit that didn't exactly fit all week on vacation didn't help. And the fact that only a very few clothes of mine fit doesn't help either. Thankfully my love affair with jeans for my entire life has guaranteed me some faithful standby pairs due to owning way too many jeans in a variety of sizes.
I was thinking this week, though, that I want to be careful about how I think about myself b/c I am a model to my girls. And whether or not I feel good about my weight or what I currently look like affects my girls! My identity rests in Jesus Christ, not in what I weigh, what size I wear, my hairstyle, my clothes, my face, etc...passing on the peace and self-confidence that can only come from a solid understanding of who I am as a daughter of God is so very important to me...and how can I teach that to my girls without deeply and truly believing it myself? So...I will NOT listen to the lies that tell me I have to be skinnier, own more stylish clothes, have perfect skin, etc. Even right now, when I'm obsessing (yes, it's true) about losing baby weight. Stop obsessing, Emily, stop! (That's a little self-talk for you...haha!)
And, after all...even if I don't lose all the baby weight...just look at them. Aren't they worth it? I am beyond blessed and so grateful for my 3 beautiful daughters!!!!
I was thinking this week, though, that I want to be careful about how I think about myself b/c I am a model to my girls. And whether or not I feel good about my weight or what I currently look like affects my girls! My identity rests in Jesus Christ, not in what I weigh, what size I wear, my hairstyle, my clothes, my face, etc...passing on the peace and self-confidence that can only come from a solid understanding of who I am as a daughter of God is so very important to me...and how can I teach that to my girls without deeply and truly believing it myself? So...I will NOT listen to the lies that tell me I have to be skinnier, own more stylish clothes, have perfect skin, etc. Even right now, when I'm obsessing (yes, it's true) about losing baby weight. Stop obsessing, Emily, stop! (That's a little self-talk for you...haha!)
And, after all...even if I don't lose all the baby weight...just look at them. Aren't they worth it? I am beyond blessed and so grateful for my 3 beautiful daughters!!!!
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